Favorite Christmas Tradition

Christmas is my favorite holiday.  I'm not sure why.  I just love it.  And honestly, Christmas wasn't a big deal.  We were poor growing up.  And after my mom re-married, it was better but different.  Not better.  Not worse. 

And so I decided I wanted to build something new.  Being the oldest and having kids young meant little support and no money to do a lot of decorating.  So I instituted some new traditions.  We bake goodie baskets for the neighbors.  We make our own tree decorations every year.  We watch every Christmas movie we can get our hands on.  We still go out and pick out a tree every year.  

We also tried to do a breakfast/brunch Christmas morning.  But family complained.  So now they can make their own breakfast.  LOL.

But I think my overall favorite is making Christmas ornaments.  I love how we pick out a style every year.  And I love seeing how both kids do the same thing in an amazingly different way.  Their beaming faces as they search for their own each year.  We haven't agreed on a theme this year.  But they are asking.  It's just nice to set an evening aside and turn off the electronics, and just make something.  

A Little Break

Sometimes life just takes you where it wants to go.  Not necessarily where you want to take it.  This year was rough.  I probably said that last year.  But that was my own funk.  We our normal life problems.  But it seemed liked so much more this year.

Our marriage almost crumbled.  We were both affected by our problems and handled them in very different ways.  And it took a devastating situation to for us both to open our eye.  I'm at that point, 14 years together is not something you just throw away.

Also it was a hard year financially.  The insurance premiums and deductibles and lack of support really got to us too.  On the bright side, Jet finally got a diagnosis for his hearing issue.  He has sensorineural hearing loss.  Which brings it's own complications and joys.  I'll start with the bad.  The bad is that to get able to get disability, he needs a 30% loss.  He is at 27%.  So that means that our crappy insurance plan doesn't cover much.  Speech charges $100 for every 50 minute appointment.  And since we have a very high deductible it means that we pay for every appoint, therapy, test, out of pocket.  And we still didn't hit our deductible yet.   But the good thing with this diagnosis is that it can stay at 27% forever.  And if it gets to at least 50% we have other options.  So there is hope.

We also found the burden of buying an older home.  This year, we have fixed the a/c and the (just recently) the heater.  With the urging of the repair saying that we should just get a whole new system as this one has lasted 8 years longer than it should have.  We also to replace the fan in the kitchen, toilet in the master, fridge, new electric wiring in the dining room, and a new dryer.  On top of 2 hearing tests at $350 a piece. 

And then there are the kid problems.  Rionn started middle school and apparently has no motivation for anything.  Everyone tells me it's a teen thing since he'll be 13 in a few weeks.  But it's driving me crazy.  We've also gone through losing several animals.  Jet rescued a baby bird that fell out of a tree, we lost 5 bunnies, and Rionn's agility dog. 

But all that is behind us.  And we all took a little break from social media and distractions.  This summer was all about relaxing and having fun.  We did lots of swimming, and movies in the park, beach trips, hiking trips.  Lots of daycations.  But it did us good.  We all feel better not rushing here or there.  We dropped a sport.  Our schedule is better too with middle school.  We'll see how that works when Jet starts school next year. 

I'm so looking forward to Christmas and 2018.  It's got to be a better year. 

Women's Day

It's international women's day today.  And I've had so many ideas for posts.  But I've been busy.  Apparently today in America, women are supposed to not work.  To show how much women really do.  And while, I'm a stay at home mom, pretty sure that my house might cave in if I don't work.

But let's go back to that word busy.  In the past month, my toddler turned to a preschooler.  He's now 4.  We threw a big party.  We've done some spring cleaning.  We've done a ton of 4-H stuff.  Rionn had a karate belt test.  Science fair project.  And on and on and on.

But BUSY is another way for mom's to tear each other down and one up each other.  This mom war business doesn't end at what brand of diapers and wipes you use.  Or if you breastfeed or formula feed or both.  It carries on.  I definitely see it more in school age mom.  The "Oh, you don't understand how busy I am.  You just don't get it."

But I do get it.  We're all busy.  And busy means something different for every woman.  My friend who is a mom to twin 1 year olds and a 3 year old is busy.  I'm busy.  You're busy.  So instead of tearing each other apart, let's ask what we can do to help.

I'm very aware of how much women do.  And that men still don't get it.  Just this morning, my husband had me searching for things.  My little kid wanted breakfast and hot chocolate.  The dogs needed out and neither the kid nor the husband felt the need to do so.  And my husband's reaction to taking the day off to show how much women do was laughable.   And I'm sure the point isn't to not work.  Most mom's and women I know, aren't taking the day off.  We can't afford to.  And that's the point.

So let me wrap up this post.  Happy International Women's Day.  May your day stay busy.  Just take a moment to breathe.  And maybe ask another woman if she needs help.  Or just a "How are you doing today?" Anything to lift another woman up and not tear her down.

One Month

I've gone 31 days, one whole month, with trying to do my new year's resolutions.  

I've done my hair most days.

I've done my makeup every day.

I've walked my 10,000 steps.

I've drank water.  (That one wasn't my best during this month).

I've chosen happy.

And you know what?  I want to say it's helped.  It's helped with my depression.  With the way I interact with people.  With the way I feel about myself.  It's surprising to me.

So here's to another month, 28 days, of choosing to be happy.

Sending Out An S.O.S.

I'm sending out an S.O.S. because MAN DOWN!  I repeat MAN DOWN!

Actually, my husband has a man cold.  It's ok.  The rest of the house has a/the same cold for a week.  I'm sure the only S.O.S. that needs to be given is to my husband.  I just roll my eyes at his whining, then blow my nose, and continue on with cooking, cleaning, laundry, taxi driving.  LOL.

Here's to surviving our first man cold of the year.

Grow With Me

I made one weighted blanket.  And since then, I've gotten several requests for them.  Here's the problem with weighted blankets.   They get outgrown.  And fast.  So I got creative.  Or lazy.  But I'm going to go with creative.  I decided to do a rag quilt so that the rows can be added on when the kiddo grows.  And it is so much easier to fill the blanket with the weighted pellets.  So here's how it ended up.  And for once, I got to make a blanket for a tween girl.  Something more grown up.  But still girly.

And I think it looks great.   So here's how I did it.

First I cut all 96 blocks in 6" squares.  I was giving myself half inch seam allowance.  So my ending square size is 5".

Then I sewed around 3 sides of the squares.

So they looked a little like this when I was done.  I did one row at a time.  For me it was easier that way.  I also cut my edges after each row.  

And then I filled the squares with the poly pellets and sewed that side up.  

This was the much easier way to do these blankets.  Last one I did I was up and down and up and down.  It took an empty wrapping paper roll and funnel to fill it.  And then I had to worry about the pellets moving around while sewing up the whole row of squares.  No messes or mishaps.

And then I sewed those squares into rows.   And then sewed the rows together.  I did one row.  Then after the second row, I snipped the edges.

Because it's been so cold and windy and rainy, my wrists hurt.  I'm sure it's the weather.  So I stood my scissors up and held my wrist straight.  Less pain for me.  And by snipping after each row, I was able to be sure I got every single square/row/edge.

So this is what it looked like after it was all said and done.  I love the color choices.  It is for a tween.  And I figured a little bit grown up would be better than little kid fabric.  And this way, they can add on.  Or I can I add on as she needs it to grow.  I'm not sure I will ever find that same fabric.  But it could easily use plain pinks,blues, greys, and creams.  

The Pain That Nobody Should Have

I haven't posted anything in a while.  Today is the 13th of January.  And my heart has broken more times in the past week than it ever has before.  My friend lost her precious baby girl at 39 days old.  Then a few days later, 3 friends lost their mothers.  Their mothers who are the same age as my mother.  And even though I don't have the best relationship with my mother, I couldn't imagine losing her.  I had a hard enough time with the death of my grandmother.  And I don't even want to think about losing one of my boys.  The pain that nobody should have.  I tried to write a post about resolutions.  And a couple about word of the year.  And somehow, none of it seems to matter anymore.  That's not important.  I think that the best thing that I can do is to live my life.  Enjoy my family.  And not take any of that for granted.  Here's to hoping that this year gets better.

Twelve

This week my first baby turned twelve.  These past 12 years have been interesting.  To watch how a person grows up in a world.  How a child clings to his parents for every move only to grow up and become his own young person.  It's definitely been an emotional roller coaster.  And I've loved it.  Sure he's thrown us for a few loops.  Some days I feel like a first time mom again.  This tween business is serious.  But I wouldn't change it for the world.  He's made me a better person.  Especially when I gave him my heart.  My whole world changed.

So here's to my first baby.  The first boy that stole my heart and kept it.  I'm looking forward to the next 12 years.