Little Mirrors

They say that if you want to see how you act, how you are in general, look at your kids.  They reflect exactly how they see the world.  And their world is at home.  Well, for the most part.  Rionn has officially entered that "tween" world.  And it's frustrating.  I'm not even sure how to describe it.  He has the ability to get things done and focus and not talk back.  But those things seem to be a problem. And well, I'll be the first to admit that this change hasn't been received so gently.  It's almost as those he can't/won't do his chores and homework without me sitting right next to him.  And then he gets all huffy and puffy, mumbles a few words under his breath, and gets upset that we're checking up on him, or watching him.  These days, all he wants to do is read.  And well, it's hard to discipline for reading too much.  Is that even a thing?  People tell me to just be thankful that he likes reading.

But I, as his mom, seem to get stern.  Then I feel bad.  Parents are often their own worst critic.  And well, I'm feeling like I've failed him.  Did I do too much for him when he was little?  Have I not let him be independent enough?  And then there are the thoughts of if he was some kind of learning disabililty.  ADD/ADHD?  And then how can I help him now.  It's hard.  He's my first.  My first in this whole new arena too.  But the other morning, I was making hubby's lunch, and Jet wanted cereal.  Rionn was fixing cereal.  So I asked him to make Jet some while he was at it.  And he was glad too.  And while Rionn was crumbling up some graham crackers, Jet was impatiently waiting.  And then I got a little glimpse of myself.  And while we all laughed at first, the more I looked at him, and the picture I took, the more it saddened me.  He was doing to Rionn what I do.  And innocently enough, we have to figure out how to get past this tween stage.  So I think I'm going to keep this picture.  Not for the humor.  Or for the cuteness.  But as a reminder to look in the mirror every once in a while.  And maybe not to stand like that.  It's not very flattering.